Love

I have a confession to make and that is that I am scared of love. Not love like love but the deeper kind that makes you wanna love somebody unconditionally whatever wrongs, flaws or all good trades that certain someone has. That is a very scary level of love for me. I know it's a little silly but I can't help it scares me more than anything, many things that scares me I can overcome and even handle but love is all around us and penetrates our lives each day in different ways. Of course I love my parents, brother and his family, my quirky friends whom represent different sides of me. Never thought about it that way before, if you meet my friends you'll see they have nothing in common except for me. But they are loyal and reliable, they are my gang and some of my biggest supporters a friend could have.

I have been thinking a lot after being at a name-giving ceremony at my aunt and uncles place. A few weeks back it was Elton's day where we celebrated him and his names. You could really see how much my cousin Hanna and her boyfriend Per loves their son but also seeing the proud grandparents and Hanna's sister Sandra being so filled with love, joy and pride over this beautiful baby boy is amazing. it reminded me when I meet my brother's son for the first time and seeing how my parents reacted to seeing their grandson. Seeing the love to a child is the most pure love there is in my eyes and you can see it from all parents when they talk about their children and the pride in their faces makes them glow a little. Of course I love my nephew a lot and he is a star in our lives with everything he has gone through. The hardest thing for me is when he says Fabro Andeas jag älskar dig/ uncle Andeas, I love you. no I didn't miss any letter, I try to write how he says it. It's adorable it really is but I feel strange saying it back that I love him to because it's not a hard thing, it's easy, to do or say but for me it doesn't come natural and I feel like I hope it doesn't sound strange to them. I hope that no one thinks that I am a ungrateful brat or idiot but this is how I feel about it. So every time my nephew says he loves my is another chance for me training on how to say I love you.

Love is the hardest thing, Love don't cost a thing, Love hurts, My heart will go on, Love is all around, Can you feel the love tonight are just a few songs that love is a prominent theme in and a few of them handle how love can effect you and what love should be about, it's not strange that a lot of songs have been written about it in so many ways after seeing what kind of effect it has on people. Love is magical and wonderful but yet terrifying and big and scary shit. We can't live without it because it's a necessary emotional journey that we need to be fine and as good as we can be, without it we are just empty shells, hollow and boring without meaning....